Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence

Domestic violence can happen to anybody. Though it is often practiced against women, the problem is not gender specific. Domestic violence is defined as the “Willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one intimate partner against another.” Domestic violence is not limited to physical violence but also involves instances of sexual assault and psychological abuse. It is experienced by people of almost ever colour, creed and religion. Domestic violence is often accompanied by dominating and controlling behavior on part of the abuser. The victim is often perceived as passive and weak and thus the abuser tries to intimidate the former.

It is not always easy to understand the nature of any relationship at an early stage and whether a person is abusive or not. Abusing tendencies of a person can develop over time due to a variety of reasons. Domestic violence often starts when a partner feels the need to dominate and control the other. The abusers always have a superiority complex feeding upon their sexist, racist or discriminatory attitudes. Domestic violence may initiate because a partner has low self esteem or confidence and turns to violent means to exert control. In traditional patriarchal societies, men believe that women are not to be treated as equals and see no harm in subjecting them to violence in order to remind them of their place and limits in the household. Often alcohol and drug abuse are claimed to be initiators of violence, however, studies have shown that people might be intensely abusive under their influence but these chemical substances are not likely to trigger domestic violence instances. Children who grow up witnessing domestic abuse start believing that violence is the only way to resolve a conflict. These young kids often mimic their parents in later stages of life.

Even though one cannot identify when a person might turn violence and start abusing, still there are a number of tendencies that often appear prior to an abusive behavior. When a partner starts showing signs of jealousy or displaced anger, it certainly means things are not in proper line. Before the actual act of violence, the victim may be accused of cheating, or stealing money. At times the abuser starts keeping account of every penny spent in the house and also refuses to give the money to the victim to pay their expenses. Often the abuser becomes so agitated that he/she starts keeping track of every movement of the victim by using devices such as GPS at times without the victim’s knowledge. When the abuser reaches his/her peak, she/he may force sex onto his/her partner, refuse to use protection during sex and even pressurizing for things that the victim may not be comfortable with.

The issue of domestic violence has been several times taken up in the Human Rights Council at the United Nations. Even though the agenda and resolutions passed at these conferences are not legally binding, they set international standards and norms. One of the most important resolutions on domestic violence is the Declaration on the Elimination of Violence Against Women (DEVAW). DEVAW recognizes violence against women as “an obstacle to the achievement of equality” and a “manifestation of historically unequal power relations between men and women,” as well as a violation of fundamental freedoms including the prohibition against torture. The issue of domestic violence was also addressed in the Resolution 58/147 where it was recognized that domestic violence affected many areas of the victim’s life and also lead to economic deprivation and isolation in severe cases. Despite these initiatives, domestic violence is on a rise. Every minute a woman is abused at home. For any initiative to bear fruit we have to change. The society needs to wake up to the injustices happening to their next door neighbor and stop them. If we simply ignore the instances of domestic violence we come across, we are equally guilty of the crime. If we make an effort, the world will be a better place.

Nikita Tandon